Parental Guidance

Warning: You would want to say hello to someone today. Say it.

One important aspect of a successful recovery to a reformed life is to have new and healthy circles of friends. However, for an ex-convict to make new friends is not easy. The stigma and stereotypes shadowing one excon would have inhibit him to keep the past to himself and this would not help in blossoming friendship where one cannot open up and strike a stronger bond with people he started to know. It would require a strong belief in oneself that as long as you are sincere towards people and taking a brave step forward in sharing an awful past trustingly hoping for acceptance.

Thus, remembering that one of my goals in SMUgging Marathon is to bump into as many new people as possible and hoping to strike new friendships and acquaintances. Though a bit unsure during the first year on how to elaborate on reasons why a student like me, numerous years older than the others, ended up doing a degree in SMU. I had two approaches, if I do not initially knew the person in class, usually I avoid the question or let them jump to their conclusions, while hoping for a better chance to elaborate when they get to know me better in future. Or if they are my classmates or friends of classmates, they would have known bits and pieces from my earlier sharing with others.

Things got better when I became a public figure in school with Wong’s published column and it became easier to make acquaintances and friends, knowing that I come clean about my past to the world and it is up to them to see and judge on dealing with their perceptions. I am glad that most of them are so accepting and through the 4 years of SMUgging Marathon, I made tons of friendship, if not at least I tried to make small talk whenever I meet people, and tried to recall names that I have noted. Feeling a bit guilty that sometimes I just forgotten names and tried to avoid saying their names while in conversation. For those who know me now, you understood why sometimes, I shouted “hey hey” instead of your name.

The internet was new to me in 2003 when I just got released and instant messaging applications just amazed me as a superb medium to stay connected to people. It was a better way than getting people’s numbers because of reasons that it seemed a bit weird to sms people you just knew with a “hihi” or “hello” but absolutely fine in instant messaging when it would be interpreted as wanting to spend time chatting. As years goes by, I also realized people change numbers more often than they changed their email addresses. Thus, whenever I met new people, I tend to always get their msn addresses rather than phone numbers unless I do find a need to call them for other matters. Unashamedly, I have over a thousand contacts in my MSN list over the years but a tinge of guilt plagued me over my efforts to chat with most of them. To add, I have also a facebook account, a social networking application where one can stay connected to people too. And I believe facebook should be the most suitable application than MSN and it allows more than just instant messaging, and include posting of pics and write notes like my blog.

I get to meet new friends in class, projects, CCAs, being a teacher assistant and school events like camps. I would love to pay tribute to them in this post.

Classmates and projects mates in my years. Learning from you, the younger ones have taught me new flexibility, both in learning and character, and subduing my past into an edge of experience to be imparted in our learning journey. I hoped you have gained as much as I have from you people.

People I encountered in the many camps and events I have participated, numerous to name but wonderful people you are. Fun is something elusive unless we have put down all things in this mundane world and get into an alien mode that shoots bursts of laughter and tears. We all had fun and the world.

Being in the SMU Student’s Association EXCO is the most memorable stint in SMUgging Marathon. I had made lasting friendships not only with the EXCO and council and also with many in other CCAs. I wish I had been of great service to you all during my term and hoped I do not owe you any more unprocessed claims.

I have been a teacher assistant for Prof Tan Teck Meng for 3 years and it involved me providing consultation for his students, my school mates. I have learnt as much as you could have when I tried creative ways of explanation and hope my tips were useful. Financial Acccounting is the language of business and hope you would not hate FA, just remember “What you have plus what you borrowed = what you buy”, “What you sell minus what you pay = your Hongbao money”.

In recognition of all the professors that I had the honour to learn from, be it I was your best or worst student, you all have made a mark on my new life and I seek to remember you by striving for the best always.

To end SMUgging Marathon with a finale, I have joined the Graduation Nite committee as Programme Head and I hope I would make a terrific evening for this new and healthy circle of friends I have.

Loves

Jimmy BOH